I wish I didn’t did so much
That I couldn’t undo
At the end of a year
And start again
I’m sorry for the trees I felled
And wrote on
And sat on
And ate off of and out of
And threw away
Forgive me my mindless consumption
The air I sucked, the plants, the fish and fowl
The water I supped and delivered back
To rivers and oceans
with added excitement
I was amorous
And sometimes delicious
And (I hope) not too poisonous
I was paid for works
That I intended for good
And I gave
But not always when I should
And aiming for balance
I toppled still
Fell apart
And had to be reassembled by the love of friends
I talked too much and couldn’t find what to say
Blamed it on my tongue
And the shadows in my head
I cobbled words on paper together instead
to make some kind of mark I strived
Beyond me is the why
I got lost
Wanting to be sought
Floundered
Praying to be caught
Dodged nets and traps and goose chases
And vanity races
I tried to be expedient
And obedient
To Listen to instruction
Pay attention
So that I wouldn’t be quick to shout at those I love
Or skin them when they shouted at me
I watched the birds
wanting to know their names
whilst envying their wings
Their songs
Their fat bottoms
Coveted curvy elegance
Not mine to design
Yearned for success
Not mine to define
I wish I didn’t did so much
That I couldn’t undo
Sorry
My feeble resolution
